At the Cross

As the school year ended, she approached my desk to ask a favor.  She wanted a couple of the crosses that were at his memorial service.  Misplaced her first one, she wanted to make sure she had at least an extra to always keep.  To always remember.  She said she might be moving. She wasn't sure.  Not knowing if I would see her before summer break, I reached in my pocket and gave her mine.  Here, just in case I don't find the others before we are no longer in touch.

Turns out...she didn't move.  

Today she was in my office.  She arrived early but she was far from cheery.  I inquired.  "How are you?"  "Not so good" was her reply as she fiddled with her paper, eyes downcast.  Not wanting to pry, but pressing forward.  "What's going on?"  "I'm just really sad today and grumpy people".  She didn't even know why she was so sad on this 17th day of January.  Here, let me share my sadness with you and I pressed.  I pressed in on her sadness to break the seal so emotion would leak out her eyes and give her the ability to release for a measure of healing.

We spoke of her plans to graduate a full year early.  Of her friend's sadness and pain in watching her momma go through cancer yet again...with a difficult prognosis for life on this earth.  We shared a hug because she thought that would make her feel better.  A hug tightly woven with common loss of a dear friend I call my son. 

I encouraged her to seek her faith and never give up. 
     She smiled. 
I told her that it was Taco Night and to enjoy his favorite meal to celebrate his life. 
     I smiled.

As if in a kaleidoscope of colors, time and thoughts of Sawyer inner mix in constant motion.  But there are days when the movement settles and the pain is in clear view without all the movement and it's easy to get lost in the feel that time is slowly creeping...as if to stand still in the moment.

Tonight was Taco Night.  Pretty sure our household wasn't the only place where the blend of corn, meat, cheese and tomatoes collided and placed a smile of the faces of those who remember and have a whole new reason to eat this yummy meal.

Here's to remembering with a smile~